Forrest Gump Meets St. Peter
The day arrives: Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven.
He is met
at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself. The gates
however, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
St. Peter says, "Well Forrest, it's certainly
good to see you.
We have heard a lot about you. I must inform you that
the place is
filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance
examination for everyone.
The tests are fairly short, but you need to pass before
you can get into Heaven."
Forrest responds, "It shore is good to be here
St. Peter. I was
looking forward to this. Nobody ever told me about
any entrance exam.
Sure hope the test ain't too hard; life was a big
enough test as it was."
St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know Forrest but the
test I have for
you is only three questions. Here is the first: What
days of the week begin
with the letter T? Second: How many seconds are there
in a year? Third:
What is God's first name?".
Forrest goes away to think the questions over.
He returns the next day and goes up to St. Peter to
try to answer the
exam questions. St. Peter waves him up and says, "Now
that you have
had a chance to think the questions over, tell me
Forrest says, "Well, the first one how many days
of the week
begin with the letter "T"? "Shucks,
that one's easy. That'd be Today
The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest!
what was thinking, but ..... you do have a point though,
and I guess I
didn't specify, so I will give you credit for that
answer." "How about
the next one?" asks St. Peter. "How many
seconds in a year?"
"Now that one's harder," says Forrest, "but
I thunk and thunk
about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve."
Astounded St. Peter says, "Twelve! Twelve! Forrest!
Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds
in a year?"
Forest says, "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve:
February second, March second, April second, May second
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter, "I
see where you're going with this.
And I guess I see your point, though that wasn't quite
what I had in
mind, but I'll give you credit for that one too. Let's
go on with the
next and final question. Can you tell me God's first
Without hesitation Forrest replied, "Andy."
"OK, OK," said a frustrated St. Peter, "I
guess I can understand
how you came up with your answers to my first two
questions, but just
how in the world did you came up with the name 'Andy'
as the first name of†
"That was the easiest one of all," Forrest
replied. "I learned
it from the hymn ..... "ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY
TALKS WITH ME, ANDY
TELLS ME †I
AM HIS OWN....."